Deerington Inbox.

[endoftheverse]

 

[A general automated voicemail plays.]
 

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[progeny]

But I chose Castiel. He felt safe. So I wanted him to look after my mom.

I made him stay with us. So it's my fault he was killed.

[endoftheverse]

Him staying with you doesn't mean you killed him, either, Jack.

How did he die?
Protecting you guys?

[progeny]

You don't understand.

[though he supposes that's with good reason. as far as he's aware, sam doesn't know what he is. doesn't know that jack was capable of influencing the world around him before he was even born]

I made him stay with me and my mom. If he'd been with Sam and Dean the whole time instead, he would've been safe.

[endoftheverse]

No offense, Jack, but the names Sam and Dean don't inspire safety.

You were just a baby, Jack. Weren't you?
Even if you had those powers, you didn't even realize how they worked.
You don't make anyone stay with you now, do you?

[He sighs softly, switching to a live voice call. Not recorded. Can't let it be, not when Lucifer's always a threat. He checks every lock and blockade in his head, and says softly:]

I know who your father is. I know what it's like, to be born with a dark shadow over you. To have powers you don't completely understand. Or... or being from a bad place and wanting to do good. I have to admit, hearing about you... scared the hell out of me, because it reminded me of myself in a way — and I don't particularly like myself. Not even a little. Not anymore.

But Jack... you're just you. Sam sees that. And... I guess this Sam sees it, too.

So give yourself a fresh slate, and understand that where you're from doesn't define you moving forward. Okay? [He breathes in.] And in order to do that, you need to protect yourself. Stay away from what's in me. Stay close to your real family.

[progeny]

[hdu talk about his dads like that!!

he has an answer to give to those questions. but before he can even start to type them out, there's a call instead, and jack wastes no time in accepting it so he can listen.

even though it ultimately leaves him with a lot more questions than he'd like.]

I'm not...scared of him. Or you. You're family. Even if you don't think you are. So...I'm not staying away. I want to spend time with you.

[and because he has to ask-]

Who told you? About my father.

[endoftheverse]

The other me did. [Which... ha. Makes sense. If he were the other Sam, he'd have done the same.] I'm sure he knew he had to, if he would be able to protect you from him.

[He's quiet for a moment.]

... You might not be scared of him, but... I am.

I'm terrified of him.

[It makes sharing a body with him excruciating. But he'd brought it on himself, hadn't he? He said yes. He took the challenge. He lost it, miserably.]

I'm terrified... of him hurting people around me. So the less people around me to care about, the better. Do you understand? It's me being a little selfish — but it's for you guys, too.

[progeny]

[knowing that sam, his sam, has been open about just who his father is leaves him confused. the man had been so adamant about him not telling anybody about lucifer, had even gone as far as to say that he could call him dad instead. so why would he have changed his mind now?

...does he know that there's a part of jack that actually wants to meet lucifer?]

If he...hurts people. That's his fault. Not yours.

[okay, how to explain this...]

Where I'm from. Lucifer looks. Different. He's using someone else. So. Even if he wasn't...using you. He'd still hurt people.

[any uncertainty with his words disappears as he continues. sure, explanations may not be a strength of his. but there really is one thing he's sure of-]

You don't need to protect me, Sam. But it's okay to let me try to protect you.

[endoftheverse]

[He shakes his head sadly.]

It's not that simple, Jack. I have fault, too.

I'm the one who said yes.

I'm not someone who deserves protection.

[He let everyone down. He failed, the one time he could have finally succeeed.

(Only he never stood a chance against Lucifer's light; never had a chance.)]

[progeny]

Yes, you do.

[why do words have to be so difficult? he just takes another moment to himself. some time to try and piece together what he wants to say.]

If you didn't say yes, someone else would. You. Saved his life. I know you...blame yourself. But Lucifer is the bad guy. Not you.

[endoftheverse]

I didn't save anyone's life, Jack. There's no happy ending for anyone, from my timeline.

[He pinches the bridge of his nose with a wince of pain, feeling his hold over the blindfold he's forced on Lucifer waning. Gotta just... wrap this up. Can't take too long.]

Listen — just... Keep your distance like you've been doing.

Do that, and help Cas and your Sam and Dean, and protect yourself.

That's all I want from you, okay?

[progeny]

No. You're...my family too. Even if you. Won't let me near you. I'm still going to find a way to help.

[whatever it takes. it doesn't matter what world sam is from, he's going to do whatever he can to make a difference]

[endoftheverse]

[He just... sighs softly. It's not like he feels good about it.

But at the end of the day... it has to be this way.]

I'm sorry, Jack. Take care of yourself.

[The call ends.]