Deerington Inbox.

[endoftheverse]

 

[A general automated voicemail plays.]
 

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[venatoris]

[ he snorts, because Dean and sinks - a no go. Dean and cars...yes. He'd built their beautiful Impala back up from nothing - legos and army men included - and he'd do it again.

He had to do it again. That's the one thing he's got to do, here, while he has the opportunity, the time. Fix her, make her beautiful, make her perfect again - gift her to Sam, maybe, that wonderful old car, because he doesn't know how long he'll be here. Dean's not that lucky, all things considered.

Dean flashes a smile at Sam, lifting a shoulder, and he nods. ]

Yeah, exactly. Something to work on. And, you know -- [ he adds, pretending it's an afterthought when it isn't, it's a plea, ] You can stay here anytime.

[endoftheverse]

[Honestly, Sam's just happy Dean has something to fix, too.

It just feels good. Using your hands for something other than hurting something. Hunting something. Breaking something. It's weird to both yearn for the days of hunting, and... also dreading the thought of it.]

I don't know. I think I'd cramp your style.

[He says it jokingly, when he is so desperately wishing he could immediately say yes. But Lucifer's little voice in the back of his head, it's telling him all sorts of things; reminds him of just how unsafe he is to be around. How off he is. How he would probably just make things worse. (Remember when he went to hell for 40 years because of you? Remember when you lied to him? Remember when you broke a promise? Remember when you left him beat up on a motel floor? Remember when you released hell on earth, and ruined his life even more than before?)

He stares a thousand-yard stare, his smile fading.

He's struggling to focus. Shakes his head, placing the wooden planks near the stairs carefully, like he's putting down glass.]

Maybe once — I can get my head on straight.

[venatoris]

[ Dean snorts, shaking his head as he glances around the cabin, brows lifted. He gives a gesture, like yeah, okay, RIGHT. ]

Yeah, there's clearly a revolving door.

[ He's not opposed to that, never has been. But he just...hasn't had it in himself to try. Too much going on, too many Sam Winchesters to worry about. ]

Sure, course. [ Baby steps, Dean. Baby steps. It's all still so new. ]