Mar. 23rd, 1992

Sam Winchester, if you're reading this — if nobody has told you what happened, or sugar-coated it — then I'm going to tell you. I'm you. No, this isn't some prank. This is you from 2014. I came to Deerington some months back, and if the spell goes the way it should and I don't somehow turn to ash from this, I aged myself back before things went to shit. Or worse shit. Point being: you're from before we finished destroying our world. After the apocalypse, but before Detroit.

You may not remember what happens after 2012, but you and I don't get to forget. We don't deserve to forget. You're not some poor sap from another timeline. You're not some Sam who made the right choices. You're me. Your clock got turned back, but it doesn't erase anything we did. Nothing. It was just a way to get the devil out of our body in Deerington, so he couldn't hurt anymore people using us.

You said yes to him, by the way. You let Lucifer in, in Detroit.

You were possessed by the devil, and the devil used you to kill millions. Billions. Humanity is nearly wiped clean.

You don't get to forget.

You killed almost everyone.

Lucifer used your hands to murder everyone we ever loved. Bobby is dead. Cas is dead. Dean is dead.

Lucifer killed him before we came to Deerington.

I thought I could keep Lucifer contained in Deerington long enough to finish the spell. I was wrong. Lucifer got control back. He killed people — killed Wastes for fun. People who had lived here, waiting to escape this place. I never got their names. I wish I could've.

You, me, Lucifer, we killed a man named Orpheus. He's a good person. Waved to us a lot, played us a song. Just wanted to see how we were doing.

We killed someone named Wu. He's a good person, just wanted to help you and keep you company. Fought hard to live. Begged for his life.

We killed a girl named Luna. She was young, bright. Wanted to talk to us about magic. We snapped her neck as she ran.

We hurt a lot of people who loved our victims, doing this. You might feel it, sometimes. You should.

Maybe it's unfair to put this on you when you haven't done it yet in your mind. But it did. It already happened. You're me. We don't just get to wipe it clean and forget. Even if I'm gone and you haven't gotten there yet, there's no fixing the damage. It happened for all of them.

Besides, you should already know from your point in time — we're a bad person.

We don't get to forget.

Whatever Dean says, whatever they do to us... we deserve it.



Don't even think of killing yourself. It won't stick, anyway, and you're not protecting anyone doing it.



But if you ever say yes again?

I hope you put a bullet in your head, for everyone else's sake.